How odd it feels to suddenly be done. With parenting. So much work!! So many years!! So much of myself poured out. So many hopes, dreams and fears for them, my little ones. And like a quiet summer’s day it all ends. They are grown and hopefully can parent themselves now, that is if I have done my job well. But the thing that haunts me is what I have failed to teach them. The things I wanted them to know, things in my heart that I thought they would somehow just catch. I am also haunted by the things I failed to protect them from although I tried so hard. Too hard bordering on being an overprotective parent. Looking back I see the pitfalls all too clearly, but at the time and with what skills and knowledge I had acquired to that point in my life – well I did the best that I could. I am not saying I was a lousy parent but I am saying I missed some things.
And so here we are now. Time in between. That’s what I call it but you probably know it as the empty nest syndrome. For those of you in it you will understand when I say to you that it is just weird. You not only have to deal with the letting go and the changing dynamics of the relationship with your now grow children but it is also a time that slaps you upside your head with the fact that, yeah you are getting older. Old maybe. Certainly not young anymore. Now I don’t just know about time, I feel it. It is moving ever onward or rather winding down. We only have so much time allotted to us. So you start asking questions. What do I do now? I see the struggles of the past and I want what is left of my future to be as good as it can be. What does that look like for me? What do I want to do with the second half of my life? What brings me joy and fulfillment? What do I enjoy? I was told by a very wise counselor that it is a stage of our lives when we start gathering information. Searching, rethinking and pondering. As I am a Life Coach I have to say this is a great time to work with a Coach to help you find answers to all these new questions.
So why do I call it time in between? It is the time between having your kids at home and when your children grow up get married and have kids so that you have grandkids!!